Pontypool (2009) Review

Review
The zombie genre is over-stuffed to the point of leaking pus, but writer/director Bruce McDonald has a plot that may prove a breath of fresh air for the flesh eating monsters. It's name is Pontypool, and it is definitely unlike any zombie movie you've ever seen. It'd be a stretch to consider it a full-out undead opus at all. What works about this film is it's strong lead actors, shock jock Grant Mazzy (McHattie), and Sydney Briar (Lisa Houle) brilliantly talk us through what seems to be several riots taking place through out the small town of Pontypool, Ontario.


If your looking for zombie action, this movie is not for you. But, unlike your average head exploding, brain devouring walking corpse films, Pontypool doesn't rely on the action or gore effects. Instead, we're isolated in a radio station on cold, stormy morning. All the action takes place here, but never once does it start to feel claustrophobic. The action lies in reports broadcasted in telling grueling accounts of murder and mayhem that's going on in the town. We're not shown such acts of violence, but it's left to our imagination to picture the chaos that's happening here. Ironically, these are the better scenes of the film, and it all starts falling apart towards the end when some action actually does occur. But the biggest turn off for the film is knowing the reasoning behind these 'zombies'. I won't ruin it for you, since this film is worth watching, and this just may make you reconsider viewing it, but the infection has nothing to do with your blood or the rendering of flesh to transfer into another victim. Looking past this, the set up of the beginning of the film is great and following such credible characters through it is entertaining enough, making this a half-decent film to watch if your a zombie fan looking for something a bit different out of your walking corpses. Well, if you want to go as far as dubbing these zombies.

Deadgirl (2009) Review

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Review: I'll admit, when going into this movie, after reading all the positive reviews proclaiming it's disturbing nature, and negative views about it taking it one step to far, I expected a little more out of it. Although it deals with a gruesome subject, I didn't think they exploited it to it's fullest. Not that I wanted to see more, but I gave into the hype and expected something far more revolting than what I saw. The subject matter here is truly terrible, and the character's actions toward the deadgirl are unquestionably disgusting, but I can't find myself disturbed but somewhat disgusted by what I just watched. Now, I won't get ahead of myself here, if you don't know the plot you may find it fairly simple:

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The premise of Deadgirl is brilliantly grueling ? two high school buddies come across a naked woman chained to a bed in the basement of an abandoned hospital. Before long, they realize that this mystery woman isn't alive, but some kind of zombie (a word the film never uses). While the more conscientious of the two kids, Rickie (Shiloh Fernandez) is squeamish about the whole situation; his friend J.T. (Noah Segan) knows a golden opportunity when he sees it. In short time, J.T. has put the dead girl to his own personal use. I won't go to far into detail, just reading the barest description of the plot will likely put off a good number of viewers. And even those who think that they're game for the movie might have second thoughts once it starts to unfold. Although not handled in an overly graphic fashion, there's no mistaking exactly what's going on. And frankly, a movie about a woman ? whether the woman in question is living, dead or undead ? being repeatedly raped is not an experience to be taken lightly. By design, this is a film meant to provoke, sicken, and upset viewers. Deadgirl raises questions about male sexuality and peer pressure ? making it an ambitious entry in the teen horror sub-genre. Unfortunately, it's only partially successful in handling its difficult material. At first, the movie handles quite well. Only Rikkie and J.T. know about the deadgirl at this point and it seems plausible. They question what to do about her, what would happen if anybody else finds out, and how could they keep it a secret. But, from there on out it seems to spiral downward into absurdity.


Deadgirl does in fact push some boundaries, it's absolutely one of it's kind, putting a very original twist on the zombie movie, but it fail's to be anything other than a twisted exploitation film set to provoke and disturb you. But, that is what horror movies are about, right? To unsettle and make you feel uneasy. But, if you look past it's desire to sicken you, you may not find much, if any entertainment value out of this film. It's a well made indy project, but it needs a bit more to make it worth your while.

Trick 'r Treat (2009) Review

Cast:
Quinn Lord as Sam
Brian Cox as Mr. Kreeg
Dylan Baker as Steven
Leslie Bibb as Emma
Rochelle Aytes as Maria
Anna Paquin as Laurie
Moneca Delain as Janet
Tahmoh Penikett as Henry
Lauren Lee Smith as Danielle

Directed by Michael Dougherty

Poison, Drowning, Claw, Or Knife. So Many Ways To Take A Life.

Review: What can I say about this film that hasn't already been said in a hundred reviews before? Best genre outing in the longest time? Pure excellence? An instant classic? Most likely if you've read a review on this film on any website you'll probably hear that kind of response. Some even went as far as comparing it to the holy grail of horror pictures, John Carpenter's Halloween (here's to you, Dread Central). There was a lot of hype surrounding this little gem that it almost seemed impossible to live up to it all. Well, I'll join the majority by saying it absolutely does, and then some.


Trick 'r Treat reads like the pages of a good issue of Tales From the Crypt, but all the separate stories flow together so well towards the end, fitting together piece-by-piece like a completed puzzle. Each yarn is Halloween-themed and has a unique story to tell, some exploiting festive urban legends, and some just added to amp up the creep factor for the viewers. Like Creepshow and other horror flicks from back in the day, it doesn't try to torment you or insult you, it simply exists to entertain you. And it succeeds. The central character is Sam, a scary little guy in a orange costume and wearing a burlap mask, dragging around a sack of halloween goodies. Although you shouldn't expect to see him as much in the film, he can be compared to Michael Myers in Halloween. The central story doesn't follow him, but he's enough of a key player in it. Like Michael, he seen briefly in select scenes as a background figure. He's not ment to fit in with the scene, but just to make his presence known through out. Forget Jigsaw, this is the new horror character people should recognize when looking back on the decade, and this is the film. It's just that good.





This is the movie us Halloween lovers (and this time I mean the holiday, not the movie) have been waiting for. It perfectly captures the essence of the holiday, and for years to come this will be out and ready right along side the other holiday masterpiece waiting to be watched. There?s just one problem: Warner Bros could care less. For two years, the studio has refused to release this little gem, while it continues to crank out unwatchable bottom-of-the-barrel dreck. This is one of the biggest injustices to our beloved genre, and in a perfect world, Warner would be put on trial for crimes against cinema. Movie lovers finally have something worth getting excited about and it?s great to see that real talent can still slip through the cracks. This holiday season, forget paying big bucks for movies like the newest Saw sequel and goto your local video store and give this instant classic a chance, you'll be happy you did.

The Hills Run Red (2009) Review

Review:
I've often found that large amounts of hype for a movie usually end up being a bad thing. Your expectations are raised so high that once you finally get the chance to see the movie you've heard raved about for months prior, it can never live up to those expectations. It's happened recently with Hatchet. Such is unfortunately the case with The Hills Run Red. Now don't get me wrong, it's an above average horror flick with an awesome concept and a pretty badass killer, it's just not really anything special. For those who don't know much about the movie, here's a brief synopsis....


A notorious horror movie by the name of The Hills Run Red was released in the early 1980's and only a select few layed eyes on it's final print before it was inexpectedly pulled from theaters for being to violent in it's all too realistic bloodshed. All copies of the film were mysteriously lost, but a young film student and horror fanatic named Tyler sets a goal to find one last print. Alongside a couple friends and the thought to be dead director of the film's stripper daughter, Tyler sets out for the woods to check out the movie's filming locations, in an effort to provide some answers by makeing a documentary surrounding it. What they find is that The Hills Run Red is more than just a movie and it's killer, Babyface, is more than just a character dreamed up from the mind of a sadistic filmmaker.


Although we've seen this concept before in John Carpenter's Masters of Horror episode entitled Cigarette Burns, you can't argue against the fact that it's an awesome concept. The reason I got so intregued in the concept is because I, and pretty much any horror fan, can easily relate to. If I've ever heard of a mysterious film like this you'd expect me to be as curious as Tyler. It's like you and your friends visiting the actual campsite used in the Friday the 13th films only to find out that Jason is actually real. That's a pretty awesome concept for a slasher set up, but unfortunetly that's all this films got going for it, the cool concept. I felt that this was a story that was packed with lame plot and twists and turns that didn't deliver too much of what I wanted or expected from it. Not that it's bad for attempting to have a complex plotline, I just didn't think all of it was necessary.


The movie inside the movie - here only hinted at through a 'crude' trailer and some pupblisity stills - looks like alot better of a movie than what I watched. That's the movie that I wanted to watch in the first place. Seeing Babyface brutally kill poeple is all I really wanted from this, and don't get me wrong, we are treated to this, but I just can't get past the fact of what this could have been but sadly wasn't. I could talk the world of how cool Babyface is (possible custom Halloween costume idea?), and there are some cool kills, just not good enough to stick up there with some of the more memorable kills in slasher history. There is however enough nude Sophie Monk to satiate anyone's desires, so that's a plus.

The Haunted World of El Superbeasto (2009) Review

Review: This movie is not for everybody. It packs enough cartoon blood, violence, and nudity here to make Rob Zombie's other movies look subtle in comparison. El Superbeasto is not a children's cartoon, it's a exploitive and twisted attempt at making an animated feature. It's filled with some great homages to classic films (practically every big screen monster is used here, everything from Michael Myers to Jack Torrence from The Shining), and of course Zombie's usual bunch is back to provide voices for the gang of misfit characters here. Although it's humor is ludicrous and at most times striving to be funny, I did in fact find myself laughing along with some of the characters. Suberbeasto is in no way a good old fashioned cartoon movie, and I wouldn't recommend it to most, all I can say is this: if you've tolerated Zombie's past work you may find some enjoyment out of this mess.


Blood, boobs, and curses. How els can you sum up a film such as this? From the start of the film, that's all your catered to, all the way up to the very end - and it gets worse and worse as it progresses. Violence and nudity in animation may fail to offend some, but there's just so much of it here that even I, one of the few people out there to which this film is made, found it to be in extreme excess. You see cartoon nipples and privates on display every two minuets. Normally I wouldn't complain about such actions, but even I found myself saying 'enough is enough'. And if you thought Zombie's characters cursed a lot before, brace yourself. To say the language in this film is extremely juvenile would be an understatement of monumental proportions. Every curse in the book is used. Said curses are strung together with the hippest street slang known to man. To add further pain, we get little melodies throughout the film as theme songs for characters or just to add curses where no one is talking at any given moment.


Not to completely bash this movie, I'll admit I like the animation here. Think along the lines of Ren & Stimpy meets Spongebob. The voice over works well too. I found the voices of Beasto and Dr. Satan (and his ape slave) preformed quite well. The opening scenes of the film were vintage and fantastic, but from there on out be warned: this is not intended for the Scooby Doo crowd.

ZombieLand (2009) Review

Cast:
Jesse Eisenberg as Columbus
Woody Harrelson as Tallahassee
Emma Stone as Wichita
Abigail Breslin as Little Rock

Directed by Ruben Fleischer

Review: Right from the start of the movie, where we're graced with an entourage of grisly yet comical zombie gore moments (in slow-mo no doubt!) played to the tune "For Whom the Bell Tolls" by Metallica. We're introduced to what kind of film this is aiming to be: nothing but a bloody good time. Zombieland is no doubt the most fun I've had at the movie theaters all year, and it's without question the best horror/comedy this side of Shaun of the Dead.


Zombieland is the story of a broken down group of survivors trying to survive the apocalypse. The setting's all the same, the world has ended, and most of everybody are reanimated corpses craving human flesh. Oh, and these flesh eaters are the fast ones here, not the slow bumbling meat bags (although, unfortunately I'd prefer the old fashion Romero style dead, it's all in the sake of a few comedic frights). Ohio (Jesse Eisenberg) is the prerequisite teen, so named for his desired destination. It?s Ohio who introduces us to the remnants of this decimated civilization, kicking things off with valuable tips to surviving any zombie encounter. Yes, those survival guide tips you are seeing in the commercials are in fact in the movie. Ohio is en route to his parents home when he bumps into the mighty Tallahasse (Woody Harrelson), who excels in zombie decimation while he scours the earth for his favorite snack cake. Hilarity ensues. Not long after, the two bump into two others survivors, who happen to be sisters, in the back of a convenient store. After this, once the story really kicks into gear we're treated to several comical moments involving squishy zombie brains being sprayed all over the place, which is more on the humorous side than disturbing, but it's all in good fun.



Some films would be content to strike the perfect mix of comedy and above average zombie effects, but Zombieland adds another dimension with just the right amount of back story for each character. These scenes, shown in flash backs, remind us the tragedy these characters went through when the dead began to rise, and how they pulled through. Accompanied by this are several bonding moments tying the group closer together. These scenes will range from laugh out loud funny to heart warming to a downright yank on your heart strings. These parts are not overly milked out nor dramatized, but just thrown in to add some interesting character development. And it surly does, because you really do start to feel for this misfit cast of survivors.


Although not in any way horrific, Zombieland doesn't skimp out on the red stuff. Blood is spewed as heads explode and ligaments are torn from helpless victim's throats. But, again, it's all in good fun here. It's a joy to see such an entertaining film come out like this. A film so enjoyable, you'll wish it wouldn't end, where you'll still be smiling after you walked past the concession stand and out of the theater. Oh, and did I mention Bill Murray of Ghostbuster's fame makes an appearance? If fun horror films such as Evil Dead 2, Army of Darkness, and of course Shaun of the Dead are right up your alley, by all means see this film right away.

The Final Destination (2009) Review

Review:
My thoughts on the Final Destination series. Liked the first one, it was something a bit different and had it's moments. Some of the second was interesting but overall I didn't care for it . Didn't like the third at all. So, where does this one fit in? I didn't have the fortune to experience it in 3D, and in some ways that could heighten the experience (it worked well for My Bloody Valentine), so I sat through it like most people in your regular every day movie theater. From start to finish, I couldn't wait for this movie to end. I didn't like it one bit.


Right from its opening credits, it's clear that The Final Destination is yet another by-the-numbers sequel that never strays from formula and offers no new surprises. But who cares? We go to these movies for one reason and one reason only: to see stupid teens die in excellent new ways. Unfortunately, all we're given here are a bunch of cheesy deaths. Sure, there's alot of them, people get crushed, burned, diced, dismembered, blown up, eviscerated, smashed, stabbed and pureed across a series of endless set-pieces. No matter how bad the movie is in the end, usually this would make up for that and then some. It could have been a fun film to watch, but what I hated were the cheesy cg death scenes. This completely killed the movie for me. The deaths, which were mediocre at best, would have been a little cooler if they were at least practical. Instead, were shown cgi blood and cgi body parts. This seems like a Scifi (excuse me, "Syfy") original movie. Besides the horrendous special effects, the writing was really terrible, the scenarios this time around were beyond unbelievable (how many times can you use spilled gasoline?), the story was paper thin, the characters were totally cardboard, but the acting was more hit than miss. I'll expect this to be on the "most terrifying night on television', or whatever the new SyFy calls it now, in a few years.


I wouldn't even consider this a popcorn movie, it was a cotton candy movie. Enjoyable in the moment but all the depth and staying power of spun sugar.